Parting advice.

B-Rad-
I read the note below about living it up, and I was impressed with your reply. Sadly, I am a senior, along with several other xc/track kids.... and this means that some of us just aren't gonna be seeing too much of you after graduation. Any parting advice for the seniors?

-Cromar

Well if you are talking about parting you hair, i think I can give a little advice. First you need to decide which side to part on. Being right handed, I naturally want to part my right side, but after looking in the mirror, my hair looks better parted on the left side. So I try to part in on the left side.
There was also a time in my life when I had much, much, much longer hair when I would part almost in the middle. Yep, the 90's were great days for hair fans, or fans of the hair...not to be mistaken with fans that blow air into your hair. It was parted nearly in the middle, though favoring the right side. It's what all the kids on the block were doing.

But sad to say, I have not parted my hair since before I was married to my sweet young bride. For that is the last time I had hair of parting length.
Truth be told, I actually don't even use a comb. I have not used a comb for 7 or 8 years. Why? Beats me. I can do a better job with my fingers I suppose. I've got millions of years of evolution in these babies, while a comb just has a few thousand years of engineering. It is obvious that the primary function of the hand is the comb ones hair.
Upon reading your question again, I think I may have been mistaken. You may not be talking about parting your hair. OS let me try this again.
If there is one thing I think everyone should realize is that life is short. I know you have heard that before, thousands, if not millions of times. But it is true. People spend the first 20 years of their life wishing they were older, and the next 60 or 70 years wishing they were younger. Always remember, Summer vacation is going to come. You next birthday will come. Soon enough you'll be able to rent a car, buy a home, buy whatever you want to, stay up all night with out asking for permission. But don't spend the time you have now waiting for those days. Trust me, the next thing you know you will be 30, 40, 50 and wonder where all of the time went.
We've all seen the insurance commercial that says: "Life comes at you fast." It's true. It seems like last year I was staying until 4 in the morning playing Ping Pong with my wife (then girlfriend) at her college apartment, thinking how great it will be when we are married. Well, being married is even better than I ever hoped for. We have 3 amazing kids that are the light of my life, a Bulldog like I always wanted when I was a kid, the tramp I never had growing up, a wife I love more than anything...even running, I have better friends than I have ever had in my life, and I think life is pretty darned sweet. But every year my kids get a year older. Things come up and we get to spend less and less time as a family. We've got soccer and basketball practices, overnight trips for work, sleep overs are friends houses. I am very happy that I am not looking back on the last 8 or 9 years thinking, you know, I didn't spend enough time with my kids. I knew the trip Amber and I took to Mexico last year was going to come. I didn't waste my time thinking about it and wishing it would hurry up on get there. It has almost been a year since we went.
I did however spend many nights sleeping on the tramp with my boys, building forts in the living room, burying treasure and making maps for them to look for it, family movie nights, coaching soccer games, wrestling, playing tag, shooting hoops, and reading children's books. I know that pretty soon they will want to be hanging out with girl instead of Dad. They won't always need me to drive them to the store, turn the shower on for them, help them find their shoe, show them how to swing a golf club, zip up their coat, help them with their homework, tell them what some word they heard on on TV means, put a band aid on for them, and that is why I love doing it now.

You need to think about the future, don't get me wrong. It will serve you well, to have goals, know where you want to be, and how to get there. Worrying about what needs to be worried about, and forget the rest. You will lose a lot of things in your life, a lot you can get back. But today is something that is gone forever. Spend time with the people you love. Do the things you want to do. Do it today, because once life comes at you, you may never get to do these things again. You may as well live your life as if this is all there is.

So my parting advice: read what I just wrote in the paragraphs above, and you should be able to get what my advice is. If not, shoot me an email and I will spell it out for you.

Livin' it up.

Brad,

I am in need of serious advice. I am faced with the last term of my high school career, and I have been told to, "live it up. Make the most of what time you have left with those you will probably never see again. You are only in high school once," but here is my problem.....as of late I have been feeling so overwhelmed with school, scholarships, running, this singing group I'm in, etc. My time is just very strained. I just want advice on how I can live it up and make the most of this last term without feeling stressed. Is this impossible??

Thanks,

The Lizard - Layton, UT

Well, you need to go to a party with Corbin and me. We, as you know from the Fun Report that comes out weekly, are the funnest people in the world. You need to shadow our every move. Find out what makes us tick? Why are we so awesome. Why is it, that when we cough, people start dancing?
But I know your time is very valuable, and as much as you'd love to do that, you can not. So now, I give you plan B.
PLAN B: Prioritize. You've got to get rid of the stress. You can't do everything. You can't spend time with everyone. And you've got to stop worrying about doing it all. Despite what you think, the friends you really care about you will see again. And thanks to Facebook, it will pretty easy to stay in contact. When I was your age, I just had to look out at the stars and sing "Somewhere out there", hoping whomever I was missing was wishing upon that same star. But you've got the World Wide Web at your finger tips.
Do you love running ?(Say no...you die.) Do you love your singing group? (So no...I won't care all that much.) These are great things. I would not suggest dumping these things as they are things you probably won't do as an organized sport after you graduate. If you throw them out, you will regret it.
So this leaves us with school. I suggest you drop out. Okay, that is not an option either. So I guess I'll have to give you something useful.
You just have to deal with it, and not stress about it. Living it up is doing what you want to do. There is no map to living it up. Being with the people you love. Doing the things you enjoy. That is living it up. If there is something you are doing now that you don't have to do, and you don't like doing it anyway...then don't do it. Spend time doing the things you NEED to do, and the things you WANT to do. I know this sounds simple...but trust me it really is. Just do it.
You are very lucky in the fact that you have great friends that are involved in the same activities you are. What is more "Living it up" than doing what you like with people you like? Nothing. You are living it up. I know things get stressful, and that is no fun. But don't let trying to "Live it up" get in your way.
I remember starting my senior year. Unlike years prior I decided I was going to get involved. I was going to get involved with school activities outside of running and sports. So, for the first glorious week I did just that. Then I spent the next few months in a hospital bed, but I still made the most of it. As you can imagine I had a lot of time to think. I also learned that it wasn't about what I did, but who I did it with. Even though I couldn't really do anything but fill the urinal up with apple juice, and sit in my wheel chair staring at the vending machine deciding what I would get when I learned to eat again, all I looked forward to was seeing people. It was then that I realized I had been doing what I loved (Running, sports, goofing off with great friends) I had great friends. People are what make the world go round. I was amazed at the people who supported me. Past loves, old friends, lover's spurned, teammates, and casual acquaintances were all there. Most have no idea what their visits meant to me. I was a 17 year old who couldn't walk, eat, or move my left arm, but I was still living it up.
So what does this mean to you? Stop worrying about "Living it up". Do what you love, with who you love. And if you do that, you are "Living it up". I wish I had some "Magical recipe" for you, but sorry to tell you, most things in life are that simple. I don't have to jump out of a plane, ride a 75 foot wave, or climb a mountain to live it up. I just have to be sitting on my couch with my kids on my lap, jumping on a tramp with 3 little boys who think I am a stud, packing a 6 year old on a bus to Phoenix or California to a Cross Country race for 3 days or go running with my best friend who I married to be living the dream. I can even go to Davis High School where my BFF is a teacher, laugh and joke for a bit and talk running with a bunch of kids who are eager to learn a thing or two about how to run the mile, from a guy who at one time in what seems like a past life was a pretty good miler. It really doesn't get much better.
Your life is in your hands. You know what you love.
Now get out there and "Live it up."

Here are pictures of me Living it up. As you can see: No Magic involved.

Hanging with my fellas!


The family.

Hanging out with my Child bride in Monticello, Utah
Playing Hoops.

XC Camp.
Hanging out with my lady, and my bro and his lady roasting hot dogs over the stove.
A few friends.
A few more friends, and brother, and my lady.
The AF boys. We're just shot at crap after a night of camping out.

Filling balloons with shaving cream, for some reason with some roommates. I decided to seize the day and shave.
Hanging out at Albertson's at around 4 AM with Heather, Kelly, and some worker.
Running at State XC. See, I did run.
A late night of shooting hoops with the guys. We went well into the early morning hours.

It is these times I miss, and love most.

Darwin's train.

Brad:

I spend a lot of time keeping up on current events around Utah. I've noticed that lately there have been a lot of incidents of people getting hit by Trax-- Guys on skateboards, drunk pedestrians, careless vagrants... you name it. Am I sitting upon a high horse thinking that someone would have to be pretty stupid to get hit by a train? Its not like a train can sneak up on you. Even if it can sneak up on you it is no surprise where the train travels--on the tracks!! My question is: Do you think that Trax is helping society in Salt Lake City through the process of survival of the fittest--you know, Darwin's Natural Selection?

David - Salt Lake City, UT

You know, I've thought the same thing David. We need to come to grips with the fact that some people are just really, really stupid. I too, have wondered how some moron could ride his bicycle, perhaps built for two, into a train. As you pointed out, it is not like it can sneak up on you or anything. At times I do think it is natural selection at work.
TRAX seems to be the perfect "weeder" for the Salt Lake City area. It takes out the dummy's while keeping you from getting blood on your shoes. It genius really.
Now it is in your hands to support this "Darwin train". Make sure we keep it around, so we can rid ourselves of ding dong's.

Facebook or life?

Which should I do first: Write my paper for Introduction to Islam, or
study for the midterm in Political Science 200? Or should I just keep
surfing facebook?

Timothy (The Bishop) - Provo, UT

Don't be stupid Tim...Facebook always wins. I'm not sure what else to tell you. Would you rather do what you need to do, or what you want to do? It's a simple choice for for me.
For instance. I really want to kiss Amber, french style, and I need to mow the lawn. Of course I'll be kissing French style FIRST.
I hope this helps.

Afraid of the night?

i am in desperate need of some advise brad....it's my daughter......she is 8 years old....and the poor little girl is scared to death of the wild animals she hears at night....she says it's animals that don't even exist....she doesn't want me to shut the door now and is pretty scared of her room.....i think we have traumatized the poor girl....what should i tell her....how can i explain where these noises are coming from?

Emily - Ogden (Greatest city in the World) , Utah

Emily, I have heard this all too many times. But see, kids are afraid because they think they should be. Here is a poem I wrote me kids.

Night Time

by Brad Anderson

1/6/2005



Night time isn't scary.

It's just different. That is all.

Although it might be spooky

when you're young and kind of small.

In a lot of ways it's better

than the day when sun is out.

I know a couple of those things

I'll tell you all about.

In the day time you can't see the stars.

and they are all so neat.

I like to watch them twinkle.

That is such a special treat.

It looks like they are winking.

It's a show that's just for me.

Sometimes they run across the sky,

so everyone can see.

And the moon is the Sun's brother,

'cept he isn't quite as bright.

He likes it when I come outside

to look at him at night.

The Moon will change his shape.

I like it best when he is round.

It looks like he's a ball of cheese

that's high above the ground.

It's not scary when it's dark out,

it's just different 'cause you can't see.

But the flowers are still out there.

Just like every single tree.

And all the birds are outside too,

except they're in a nest.

And when it's time for them to sleep,

they like the dark the best.

Even though it's dark outside

I know my bike, and toys are there.

They're laying where I left them

with no worry and no care.

When it's dark the world is not so loud.

There aren't a lot of cars.

Then I don't have to speak so loud

when talking to the stars.

And I like things when they're different.

It is nice to have things change.

But if you never try it out at all

you'll always think it's strange.

And then it might seem scary

even though it's really not.

I bet if you give night a chance

you'll like the dark a lot.





* NOTE TO READER: I never wanted the boys to be afraid of the dark. So I have always tried to get them to see the good parts of it. If they seem a little scared I've always said:"See the Dark isn't scary. It's just different." Then I point out all of the things are out side, but they just can't see them. So neither of the boys really have a problem with the dark. I figured the only reason people are afraid of the dark is because they have been told they should be. Anyway, that is where the idea for this came from. (Do realize I still run inside as fast as I can when I am at my Mom's. Because there are Monsters there. The trees behind here house are spooky. Just don't tell my boys that.)