Friends and lunches

1. What do you do if your best friend is angry and jealous about something that she won't talk to you about it?

2. What do you do if one of your friends takes your lunch box and then eats something out of it and won't give it back no matter what you say?
( P.S. these are not the same people.)
Thank You Brad!!!!!
Hallie - Ogden, UT

Dearest Hallie,

I am happy you have come to me for help. I will solve all of your problems and your life will be better than ever.

So your friend is jealous and angry? Well, if you want to know why, there are a few simple steps you can take to get in the "know". When she is asleep, dress in all black, sneak into her room and steal her diary. Surely, if she (Assuming it's a she) is a true blooded American girls she has written all of her feelings in the diary. WARNING: If she wakes up while you are thumbing through her diary, throw a white sheet over your head and act like a ghost. This will A: Freak her out. and B: Keep her from seeing your face. A Win Win if you ask me.
Or, you can ask her about it. Tell her it seems like something is bothering her, and as her friend you want to help her out. If she still won't tell you, then you just half to chalk this one up as "Crap that happens when you're growing up". Usually, if she won't tell you it is because she doesn't really know how to do it without making you mad. If she refuses to talk about it, then try to get her mind on something else. Just make sure she knows that you are willing to talk, as her best friend, whenever she is ready.

Problem #2. Now this one is near and dear to my heart. Not because it happened to me, but because ain't nobody gonna live messin' with my hoagie! Step one: Collect all of you cat and dog droppings for 3 or 4 days. (Make your brother do it.) Then make him smash them all together. Cut thin slices of the "Dog Poop surprise" so they look like slices of ham. Then make, or have your brother make, a delicious looking sandwich. When this "Hoagie stealer" takes your lunch they will be in for a giant surprise. If they don't take the Hoagie, then have rice pudding filled with rabbit droppings as a back up. Soon, the joke will be on them. "Ha ha, good one." is what the other kids will say.
If you don't feel up to packing this "Dog Poop Sandwich" in your backpack for half of a day there are other, though not as fun, things you can do. First of all, you need to realize something. When someone picks on you, or steals your lunch it is usually because they are jealous of you. Most people, instead of just being happy with who they are, will tease or bully other people to try to feel better about themselves.. Of course, this doesn't make people think they are cool, just jerks. Luckily, most kids outgrow this when they are older. (But outgrowing this lunch stealing fiasco doesn't help you now. So let's find more ways to clear it up.)
Again, the first thing is to talk to them. Saying: "If you don't have enough to eat my Mom can make you something to eat too." This might make them kind of embarrassed, and it takes the power away from them. They are taking it from you to bother you. Turning it around on them can take the wind out of their sails. You could even, one day, bring a sandwhich that has their name on it. You can say: "I figured you didn't have enough to eat since you always take some of mine, so I went ahead and had my Mom make you one." They won't really know what to say.
But if talking to them doesn't work, you only have a few options. Tell a teacher (Privately of course) guard your lunch with your life or just continue to let it happen. It is tough because you don't want to make the bully target you in other areas. But sometimes ya just gotta tattle.
But the biggest thing you must realize is that they are the problem NOT YOU! You didn't do anything to deserve someone picking on you or stealing your lunch. It is their problem. They are the ones who feel they need to pick on you to feel good about their self. You are a great person, and you can never, ever, ever, ever forget that no matter how many Hoagie Sandwiches, brownies, Cookies, Corn bread, Lima Beans, String Cheese sticks, Pizza balls (A Personal favorite), salads, cupcakes, or Corn Dogs end up inside this lunch box stealer's belly.
No get your brother out picking up dog poop. I'm sure you're going with my first, and best idea.

Freaky Roomates

Dear Brad, I have recently moved to a place where I share my living space with 5 girls who I am unfamiliar with. For the most part, they are really nice. We don't seem to have problems with like catfights or anything...yet. However there is one roommate who is very...abnormal. She freaks out about every little thing and takes it as a personal offense. One night she got mad at me because the sink was dripping and I was the last one to use it (how the heck would she even know that?!), she calls her mom about every homework assignment and gives her a play by play. And she has zero tolerance for pain (she went to a physical therapist when her hands got tired from typing...). These abnormalities aren't TOO bad. I mean, I can easily brush off her little freak outs about dripping faucets, I don't take that personally. And seeing as I'm thinking of becoming a PT, I don't mind the fact that she gives them steady business. The problem is that SHE does things that if I did, she would way more than freak out at me. For instance, I came home today and noticed that her hair dryer and straightener were on my bed. My first thought, "ew, does she like, do her hair on my bed?" Then I realized that her straightener was ON and had been all day! I'm pretty sure that could have burned my quilt. I don't feel like that is an acceptable behavior. But when I was irritated by the fact that her hair tools where on my bed and as hot as can be, she acted quite offended that I would call her out on it. The thing is, I want to be polite, but I also want to be respected. But if I say nothing, nothing happens and if I say something, nothing happens and she thinks I'm the bad guy. I don't care if she's weird, she thinks I'm weird too. It's just that when her weirdness overflows onto my things...that isn't ok. I don't like finding half-eaten plates of tofu on my desk. I still have like 8 months of this and transferring living quarters isn't really an option at this point. What do I do?

Jessica- Provo, UT

First things first. Begin by writing up an official declaration of war. And then run down to Home Depot and buy some 2 x 4's and plywood. Divide your room in half. Once this nut case steps foot on your side, hand her the declaration of war. Sure, she may balk at this declaration, but that's not your problem...she is now, officially the enemy.
Then offer no mercy for the rest of the semester, leaving the tap on any time you want. Dirty dishes in the sink? Not your problem either. "Oops! Her hair gel is mixed with glue!" Did you do that? who cares. This is war baby! and treating your apartment as such will bring joy to your Freshman year.
OR
You can TRY to make the best out of a bad situation. Trust me, there is nothing I hate worse than someone who makes a big deal out of nothing, or is all up in my grill about my bees wax! But you need to realize this is her problem. You will not change her. And you have a choice. 1: Be annoyed all semester. or 2: Try and work it out. If it gets worse you may need to sit down with her and talk about it. You can tell her your concerns and she can cry about it... I mean, express hers. Point out that a dripping sink is not a big deal. When the sink is dripping acid on babies, then she can come cry about it to you.
She is going to do stuff that bothers you. You choose to let it bug you. Instead of it bugging you, find the humor in it. It is funny she calls her Mom over everything. The play by play is funny. Try laughing to your self. Her doing annoying things will only get more annoying unless you find the humor in it.
You are going to deal with any people in your life that will drive you nuts. They can either ruin your day, or give you a chuckle. I had room mates that drove me nuts. My first one in fact (Pictured below) lives in infamy. Some of my room mates and I still laugh about it. We turned what he did into something funny to us. And we have had years of smiles because of it. (Ask me about him sometime. Trust me, you will laugh.)

The Boaz- "Wanna Grapple?!?!
(Picture taken WITHOUT strict or written permission from Jeremy Boaz and was used in the "Learn how to wrestle" flyer placed throughout the campus of BYU-Idaho.)

But I am not trying to act like we didn't have little acts of war from time to time. In fact, those acts of war are some of the funnier things we talk about.

This is your freshman year for Heaven's sake. Don't let a crazy room mate screw it up for you.


ROOMMATE DRIVING YOU NUTS TALKING ABOUT HIS SINGING PROWESS?

Talk him into putting on a show in your apartment.
Name your apartment the "Show Boat Theater" and get "The Magnet Man" to be your headliner.

Have him put on a "great"...or a show!


Earn yourself so extra cash selling tickets to his show by telling people it is for a business class. And then sell out your apartment.

Parking Bum.

Hate looking like an inconsiderate bum? I bet. Well, here's a tip to keep your lazy butt from look so danged inconsiderate.
Now, we know you aren't the most important person in this Universe of ours. It's time you know that too.
When it says "No Parking" in the fire lane in front of a store... Well, that means you too. No, it doesn't matter that you are sitting in your car while your wife, husband, buddy, son or 5th Grade PE teacher runs in to get Ho Ho's and Slim Jim's for your party. Yep, it's still a fire lane.
I know you assume since you have a party, and guest are chanting "Ho Ho's" that you are now able to park there. But let me assure you that it is still a fire lane.
To help you avoid the rolling of eyes, and gnashing of teeth, find a parking spot like the rest of us. You may even burn a calorie or two. (I know. I know. Heaven forbid.)
Look, no one likes an A Hole. Just park and walk.

You're Welcome.

The Best Friend.

Dearest Brad,

Here's the situation. Over the past couple of years, there has been a girl that I have been somewhat attracted to. We talk every now and then and both have wanted to go out on a date for some time, but because of her hectic schedule and my running schedule, we haven't been able to do so. But recently, I have noticed another girl, one who just so happens to be her best friend. And of all the best friends I've ever seen, she is definitely the BEST. I haven't actually had a conversation with her, but when we pass each other in the hall at school, we smile and say hi, each one feeling the intense chemistry. I would love to ask her out. Now here's the question. Should I ask the first girl on a date first? Or should I follow my heart and just head straight for the second. Either way, I know they will talk about that date, and if I go with the second girl first, the first girl might feel a little jipped. What do you advise?

Sincerely,

Joe...alone and confused

My advice for you is simple. Take them out on the same date and they can have a knife fight to prove their love for you. Last one standing, or has the most fingers left gets your love.
OR
You really need to pick which one you want the shot with and go for her. With the two of them being best friends, a lot of times it's one or the other. Many times in my youth, I tried the ol' "Get the girl by going through her best friend", only to find that once you have dated the best friend, your chances with the other girl are no longer there.
If you don't single one out you'll be sitting on your porch in overalls with a mason jar of Kool Aid, and a harmonica singing: "I kinda loved two girls but now I kinda lost them both..."
Now go forth and replenish your heart!