The Cookie Dunk!

Ok Brad, I have a dilemma (first of all I can't spell, but that's a different story...). I like to have my milk and cookies for a snack every now and then, but the problem is I don't know what Kind is best! When I was a wee tot my favorite cookie hands down was the Oreo, but now that I am older and wiser I have grown more fond of the chips deluxe. I need to know which kind of cookie is the best to perfect the milk and cookie experience. Please help me.

Cody-Kaysville, Utah

Cody, you have asked about something that is very near and dear to my heart. I love cookies and milk. I love them so much I actually thought about marrying them. But find a state where that's legal.
Your dilemma is nothing new to the world of dilemmas. In fact, this dilemma was had by such greats as, President Roosevelt, Lee Iaccoca, John Bon Jovi, Edgar Allen Poe, Paul Reuben's, Brett Barrera, Art Monk, Andre the Giant, and The fast talking Micro Machine man, just to name a few. What to dip? What to dip?
Let's break them down shall we. Oreo's. Mmmmmm a very fine treat. I love them. in fact, I thought about marrying them...wait...did I already tell you that? They are truly delicious, but for me, probably the wisest person sitting in my office right now, doesn't like to dip them. They just don't have the "dipability" that other cookies have. And what's with that blackness in your teeth? It hasn't been since the Dark ages that blackness in teeth was seen as something noble, or even close to what as suitor was looking for. They are delicious, yes this is true, but they carry too much baggage to be named a favorite among favorites.
Chips Deluxe? Sure, they are a worthy opponent of the Oreo, but still fall short of the Oreo goodness found in the Oreo cookie. They are "Chippy", if you are into more chips than your sweet tooth can tolerate. They are head and shoulders over the Oreo in the dunkness department. But they're small, and don't absorb milk like I need when dipping. I need that cooking to be at one with my skim milk. They need to, nearly, dance with one another as they dip in an out of my glass. It must be as if the are serenading me as I eat.
Now I know we have look at the pros and cons of each cookie treat, but what kind of advicateer (Here's some advice: make up your own words. It's fun.)would I be if I didn't show you what a true cookie is. I am about to give you the recipe that my beautiful cookie making wife will make for me when I need a belly full of cookie. I may have you over some time to dunk a few for yourself. The one thing that the recipe does not mention is all of the love she puts into it, and not to mention how good she looks cooking them.

Brad's dunktastic cookies for dunking in dunkable skim milk.

1 cup Shortening
1 cup brown sugar
1 cup white sugar
2 eggs (Preferably chicken eggs, though Snake or gator eggs work too.)
1 tsp Vanilla
1 1/2 Cup flour
1 tsp Salt (Or less if desired.)
1 tsp Soda (Not soda pop ya ding bat.)
3 cup Rolled oats

Cream shortenings and sugars. Add eggs and Vanilla. Beat well. Sift flour, soda, and salt. Add to creamed mixture. Stir in rolled oats. Roll into small balls; place on cookie sheet, and flatten with a glass. Bake at 350 degrees for about 8 to 10 minutes, or until lightly brown.

Try these with skim milk and your dunking questions will subside. My preference is 5 to 6 cookies, and more and you will be a fat, fat man. Good thing you are a trim runner. You could use a few cookies.
Please let me know how it goes.

As for spelling; you did just fine. Yu r a gud spelr. Dont let peeple tel yu yur not a gud spelr. if thay do thay ar dum peeple who dont spel no gud.

Now go and dunk some more!

QUESTIONS?